by Will Young once said (sung): “Sometimes you pass the good ones because they strive too much to see them too much.” Maybe he was on something.
Because as much as we have better equipped to recognize red flags in our romantic partners, not all of us notice when we have a good thing.
It also says reason. We were not only to assume that real love pursued by avoiding types that are a “challenge”, but we are also tired by dating apps and exhausted from previous experiences. So much so that we don’t always give the person enough chance.
This is something that Georgina Sturmer, a British association for advice and psychotherapy (BACP) -anched therapist, notes. “In relationships there is a lot of misconduct – large gestures, shiny gifts, the powerful attraction of the romantic connection,” she says to Yahoo UK. “And that can make us overlook the importance of the green flags; the simple things that show us that a relationship has longevity.”
She also emphasizes that many of us are guilty of comparing our relationships and potential partners and added: “The comparison can often have a negative tendency. We could concentrate on what our partner not do and not what you Are do. Or we can set the things that the outside world sees, how career success or physical properties and not the way we are treated. “
So what green flags should we pay attention to?
4 Relationship green flags that you may overlook
How your partner connects with your friends and family is the key. (Getty Images)
1. Greet the idea of spending time with your friends and family
According to Stormer, a common Red Flag is if someone isolates them from their loved ones. In contrast, a safe partner will welcome the idea to spend time with your friends and family.
She says: “You may not necessarily be all the best friends, but you will understand the importance of these people in your life and you will strive for you.”
The interest in their hobbies is also a good sign. (Getty Images)
2 .. show interest in your hobbies
“Of course, it is to have different preferences and disruptions in a relationship,” added Stormer. “But when a partner shows interest in our hobbies and interests, we give the feeling that he really takes care of it – even if or, especially if – your interests are completely different.”
It could be everything, from a television program or a sports team to a band or a musician you like.
Termostics do a long way. (Getty Images)
3 .. Note the little things
Large gestures have a place when it comes to romance. But according to Stormer, it is the little things – the “service bars” – that can really give us the feeling of thinking.
“Do you remember the ‘Orange Peel theory’ that became viral?” She asks. “The idea is that it is the small actions that we do in this show that we really know and that we are happy to do it to do it – without being asked. Fill the car, take your favorite food out of shops or even an orange for you.”
Do you really listen to you? (Getty Images)
4. Really Hear
We spend a lot of time talking and listening, but in relationships Stormer realizes that we don’t always feel that we really have heard.
“Sometimes our partner quickly jumps to calm, rescue or criticism or advice. Or the two words that sound helpful, but usually not: ‘At least …’
“If we find someone who really just wants to listen to what we have to say, it helps us to feel and support us.”
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